We have been getting more sleep around here! This is major news!!!
Right about when Arabelle started sleeping through the night (October 2015), Owen was having some sleep issues. He would fight us at bedtime and then wake up and would expect to sleep in our room. Since he was in charge, that is what we did. For months. Because when we would put our foot down he would make a loud stink and then we would cave and allow him to do as he wished.
How did we expect it to ever change? His behavior wasn't changing, in fact, he was waking up earlier and earlier, just as we would be going to bed, around 9/10pm.
We were so over it, the restless sleep, the interuppted nights of coughing, "I have to pee", and on and on. We love him, but not on our floor every night. Not for us. The zombie look is not dashing on us.
We tried "everything" to make his room more appealing. But he didn't want his room. He wanted us.
His pediatrician recommended we see a behavioral therapist. Sign me up! We needed help and encouragement!
The take away from the appointment was that Owen has fears, and in order to overcome them he has to face them. Duh. We know that. But we were never having him face his fear. Who likes to do that!!?? Not me!!
We prepared for this change of rules over a few days. We discussed it with Owen. We were going to start on a Friday. Thursday as we were falling asleep he woke around 10. He didn't get out of bed but was crying softly for us. We changed our behavior and didn't respond.
He stayed in his room.
Did you read that? There was no physical struggle, he was most certainly distraught, but he stayed there, without us having to "keep him in there". He was upset and vocal for about and hour and a half. At that point we decided to turn his light on and allow him to read books.
This is what I found in the morning:
I checked on him at 145, still awake. Chris checked on him at 4 and he was asleep. This was on a school night! He literally slept 715-10, then probably 3-6am.
In the morn he said his neck hurt from reading and he read every single page of the 60 books!
There is a light! We are slowly starting to get more sleep. He still wakes up to go pee here and there but he just sneaks out of his room and sneaks back in and falls asleep.
This has been flawless for 3 weeks, only one hard night, the first one.
We are tackling the next battle with bedtime tomorrow... So keep us in your thoughts. When he falls asleep, we have been in the habit of staying in his room until he falls asleep. We are weaning they tomorrow. I'm writing this from my phone laying in the extra bed in his room!
Fingers crossed it is a smooth transition. One of my biggest hopes for my kids is that they have good coping skills. I guess facing your fears and being alone sometimes is a way to strengthen them and give them skills to calm themselves and enjoy being with themselves.
Next step- we are out of the room
Step after that- turn the light off! The overhead light is on! It's like high noon in here! With a salt lamp and a night light! Whew.
Well he is asleep, and I'm headed there soon.
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